Monday, June 30, 2008

I AM THE LAW!!!


FYI: I am the law.

That is all.

S

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

10 Things... the addendum.

I've come to realize that in addition to my "10 Things" post, there are a couple other things that I'm currently loving that did not make it to my list amongst the more 'non-serious' ones.

11. Lego Star Wars for the Wii | Seriously, this game is epic.

In the latest make of it, it combines ALL 6 episodes into one jam-packed piece of awesomeness. With FOUR different modes of game play (which all must be completed in order to 'win' the game) with lots of hidden extras, coupled with an INCREDIBLE gaming interface with the Wii makes this game one of the greatest ever made!


12. Batter Blaster | That's right: Make a better breakfast faster... Batter Blaster.

I'd write more, but I wouldn't want anyone to think that Laura and I are competing on this front page worthy phenomenon. So, read all about it here, at Laura's blog.

So yeah... enjoy both of these pieces of goodness...
SLIM

Thursday, June 12, 2008

10 Things I'm Lovin' Right Now...

(in no particular order)

1. Wine | I’ve often had a glass of wine with dinner. It was always good. However recently, I’ve discovered that in the correct time and quantity, the maximum ‘holy buzz’ is achieved.


Now, I’m not sure if the ‘holy buzz’ actually exists, perhaps that’s a question for ‘Prodigal John’, the author of stuffchristianslike.net, but in MY head the ‘holy buzz’ is that moment of alcoholic trippiness that brushes the border of drunkenness… which by ‘Biblical Law’ does not constitute as ‘drunk’. (See also: TIPSY, FADED,)


2. Dudetians | Believe it or not, in a galaxy far, far away (Woopsy… did I steal that line!?) there exists a planet known as “Duditer” (sounds suspiciously like “Jupiter”) where the inhabitants are all exact replicas (except for their distinct aqua-marine color… duh… everyone knows that) of my dog, Dude. These crazy animals, with ball-topped antenna on their craniums (think pom-pom), are known simply as “Dudetians”.

During a trip to the planet Duditer, I was able to capture this picture of the King of the Dudetians. Know only as: El Hombre.



3. Dudes Night Out | Or DNO, if you ask all of the TVs, microwaves, lamps, computers, soda cans, wine bottles, glass windows, mirrors, and paint cans that have recently been blown up by the Dudes of Dudes Night Out at our two most recent get togethers (and if you ACTUALLY ask them, you might need to look into professional help...). These were both long days full of a bunch of dudes and WAY too many, unnecessary firearms.

Dudes Night Out – the concept is simple… you leave the ladies at home… and the DUDES go OUT … at NIGHT (or sometimes during the DAY… but that would read: DDO, which is too much like ‘Dido’ …. And who would listen to that garbage? “You know how I know you’re gay? You listen to Dido.”)


We’ve even gone so far as to secure the web domain for DNO: www.dudesnightout.com. Yeah… evidently we’ve got that kinda time.


4. TAPCO AK Furniture | Of course, the last one opened the door right up for this one. I recently outfitted my AK-47 with this new furniture set (minus the stupid see-through mag. “You know how I know you’re gay? You’ve got stupid see-through mags on your AK.”) from TAPCO U.S.A.:


Not only does it fit perfectly, but it looks AWESOME. Shoots like a dream too. You know… not that that really matters…


5. Ant Bites | Yeah… just kidding.


6. Alex Cuba | I’m not sure if you’re “into” Latin music, or ‘Musica Latina’ as our Spanish-speaking friends would say, but you’ve GOT to check out Alex Cuba’s latest (and sophomore) album: Agua del Pozo. It’s a little hard to find in the store or online, but is, of course, readily available on iTunes.


EVEN IF YOU DON’T SPEAK SPANISH: buy it. Music is the universal language (along with money… and hugs. Both of which I’m in need of)


7. “FLASH” Shirts from [db]B | As most of you know, I’m a MASSIVE fan of the Dustin Burke Band (myspace.com/dustinburkeband). After a couple trips to their hometown of Dayton, OH and many conversations, my company (SLIM|LINE Visual Communications, www.slimlinedotcom.com) has become the exclusive Marketing & Merchandising company of the Dustin Burke Band.

We recently did these shirts as a joke for the guitar player, Flash Burke.

They make me laugh every time I see them.


8. My Mothers Alfredo | My mother is not Italian. Not even close, actually. She’s a lil’ Irish woman from the South of the US. She’s the best cook on the planet, especially when it comes to Southern food. Italian food was never plentiful in our house. I mean, outside of spaghetti and the occasional lasagna, we never really had homemade Italian.

Well, recently my mother tried her hand at an Alfredo pasta… something that she’s never done…

Blew me away! Seriously… my mom is amazing.


I had to look up the origin of Alfredo sauce… here it is:

So, there was this one guy, right!? His name was Alfred. He was kind of a nerd, so a lot of people in their town didn’t really know him all that well.

So anyway, right, he was making a sauce. Alfred’s sauce… if you will.


He let some of his buddies try it, right, and they were all “ Dude… this John’s is banging, son!”

They started to make it in larger batches and sell it in the town market. People would always be all “Yo, what is this sauce!?!?” and the merchants would be all “Oh, that dude Alfred makes this sauce.” And the consumers were all “Who?”

“Alfred.”

“Who?”


“You know, that dude Alfred… he lives up the hill.”

“Hmmm… Alfred… Alfred… Alfred..”

“You know! The dude with he crazy thick glasses and talks to himself all the time!?”

“Hmmm….”

“Seriously! You know the dude in math class back in middle school who ate grasshoppers for money!?”

“AHHHHH…. ALFRED, OH!”

From that point forward, the sauce was known as Alfred-Oh sauce… however, when it was brought to the states, they changed the name of it at Ellis Island… you know… to make it sound more American or something.

(long way to go for a bad joke… I know.)


9. Men | Yeah okay… we all know this isn’t new… I totally love dudes.



10. BBQ Chicken Chopped Salad from CPK | Srsly! This delectable piece of heaven should been called the ‘BBQ Shiznit Chopped Salad’ because for real… it’s the shiznit.


For those of you who would like to make your own, here’s the best recipe for it (with some minor changes to make it even better) from my friend, Julie, at momswhocook.blogspot.com:

2 chicken breast cooked and chopped
1 bunch romaine, 1 head iceberg chopped
1 c. jack cheese grated
1/2 to 1 can black beans drained and rinsed
1/2 to 1 can corn (optional)
1/2 c. chopped red onion
chopped cilantro to taste
chopped tomatoes
chopped cucumber (optional)
jicama (optional)
tortilla chips
Bulls eye BBQ sauce
Ranch
limes

Cook chicken and cover in bulls eye bbq sauce. Chop and toss the rest of the ingredients. Toss with the ranch dressing, crush chips, squeeze lime, and drizzle BBQ sauce on top right before serving. I like mine, drenched in BBQ sauce and lime!

Make it. Now.

So, ladies and gents… this concludes the “10 Things I’m Loving Right Now” thread on my blog. The ‘challenge’ in this post is to pick 10 things that aren’t things that you’ve loved all your life, and are not your family, close friends, etc.

They say this is really hard. I found it pretty easy. But I digress…

Mad Love,
The Slim One

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Ants...

...they ate me....

.....ate me good.....

But seriously... I recently made some invites to give to Laura for an upcoming suiree. Now, if you know me, you know that I'm not good with that whole "remembering stuff" thing.... so needless to say, I was rather impressed with myself for bringing them home! Not to mention, I also remembered to bring home two Tupperware (not actual Tupperware, it's the off brand... you know... 'cause we're cheap....) that had been sitting in my office.

Well... naturally, I didn't remember to bring all of the stuff into my house.

Laura woke me this morning, asking where the invites were so that they could be cut a distributed accordingly. In my attempt to be chivalrous, I decided to roll out of bed (take a squeege) toss some shorts on (ewwwww...) and retrieve said forgotten items..

I should've worn waiters and galoshes , evidently...

Much to my surprise (which really shouldn't have surprised me at all) after opening my passenger door and filling my hands with the goods, I found myself in an immense amount of pain... generally in my footular region.

I looked down at my feet (insert fat joke here) to see them covered in roughly 1.3 billion ants. They proceeded to eat my feet, paying special attention to my right foot. (see below)

Due to the fact that my hands were full, and throwing my wifes invitations on the wet ground was not an option, I had to take it like a man, and leave the flesh eating terrors on my feet until I got in the house... at which point, I cried like a school girl.

That's my morning. It's a WONDERFUL start to my day...

(be on the look out for "The Slim-One Presents: '10 Things I'm Loving Right Now'" coming soon!)

Friday, June 6, 2008

Funk...

...I've been in one...

...for a while...